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It wasn't the right time and I guess the price I pay is never forgetting that look on your face when I made my carnal confession: a mix of fascination, fear, and uncut horror.īut the most humiliating source of Cupid’s misguided arrow was Jay. Sorry I chose to tell you I was in love with you after you confessed to me that your parents were getting a divorce, something that was clearly really upsetting you. Ah, Alan, you really bore the brunt of my obsessive affection for years. My mid-20s saw me falling for Alan, lead singer of a local indie band in Sydney. One night we got very drunk and made out in an elevator, which somehow led to me slapping him across the face and starting a band together. Later, in my early 20s, I couldn’t resist the plump lips and bedroom eyes of my Greek gay bestie, Peter.
#Handsome gay men in love license
I was so furiously in love with Matt that I swore to myself, with every ounce of resolve in my tiny girl-child body, that when I learned to drive, my first license plate would read "MATT." Luckily, I never learned to drive, as Matt’s current profile pic on Facebook features him wrapped in a rainbow flag.
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With his huge brown eyes and mop of chocolate-colored hair, Matt looked like a cross between Bastian from The Never-Ending Story and a Labrador puppy. There was Matt, my first crush at age 8, best friend of the boy next door. No, I mean spending a good chunk of my teens and 20s crushing on guys who would never (and could never) return my feelings. My persistence in falling in love with gay men.Īnd I don’t mean having a crush on Neil Patrick Harris or dreaming about removing Anderson Cooper’s black-framed glasses to share a thin-lipped kiss. No, I’m sharing a persistence that lead to heartache and humiliation. But the story I’m sharing tonight isn't about the persistences that have paid off for me. I’m persistently creative: I make a living as an author, a feat born of dogged persistence in the face of constant career instability and unsold manuscripts. I’m persistently social: If I’m throwing a party, you better believe I’ll be sending you an email, a text, and a Facebook and Paperless Post invite. If you know me, you know I am persistent.